• Warning: Not for those who blush and are offended by mention of girly bits

So I’ve mentioned that on Sunday nights my hubby and I play “Monday’s not really coming” by staying up late and watching whatever happens to be on TV. Which for us is Grey’s Anatomy. There’s one character we watch it for: Dr. Bailey, who I guess is some kind of supervisor. She’s this spunky woman who smacks down whoever – doctors, interns, etc. – any chance she gets.  I guess she was pregnant because one episode we tuned into she was giving birth.

I didn’t really pay attention, obviously since it’s a “let’s just leave the TV on and deny life starts again soon” show, until one point when she was being examined. She was already very cranky (something about her husband got hurt on the way to the hospital so he was in surgery and she was denying the forces of labor because he wasn’t there), and her a very shy intern/doctor/resident/whoever they are was trying to convince her to be examined.  She gave in, they probably had a touching moment, and then out of the blue she barked: “O’Malley: stop looking at my vajayjay!” (See, Gran and Uncle Bubba: you didn’t really want to read this). I laughed. A lot.

Then today, laying on the couch with a weather-changing-induced headache (storm’s coming in: I have a better barometer than Mary Poppins), I had the tv on and at some point was dozing to Dr. 90210, that horrible Hollywood plastic surgeon “reality” show. He was fat-sucking one of his receptionists – this teeny tiny woman who had no fat but felt “flabby and had low self-esteem” after having a baby: whatever. Even he commented that he couldn’t get any fat out of her.

He didn’t just take the two ounces of flab off of her body. He also engaged in a very important, life-giving procedure – his favorite in fact.  He gave her a vajayjay tuck. Yes, you heard me right. And so did my grandparents who are rolling in their graves and probably blaming my Yankee upbringing for watching such things (and my mother would say that she raised me better than this.  Which she did.  But i was transfixed:  I mean, EW).  The most disturbing part? At the end of the surgery he leaned back, examined his work, and deemed it “adorable.” ADORABLE!  Words fail me at this point.
Dr. Ray then went to some special event to earn his black belt, a process which has taken him over seven years (twice as long as medical school: I don’t know which fact is scarier). Yeah, earning your black belt will take away the memory of what you said and establish our confidence in your manhood. Oy.

Daily Drivel, Entertaining Evidence